Posting what I'm about to write actually feels really
vulnerable to me. I've written vulnerable things before but typically they are
past vulnerabilities not real time, current vulnerable things. So here it
goes... A walk through my mind and heart so to speak...
No matter how hard we try, the little things stick. I'm
talking about little things that people might say or do to us. Or maybe random
things we read. Those little things begin to shape us. Sometimes they can shape
us for the better; other times, not so much. And thrown in between can be downright
lies. We are not always aware of the lies, or how the little things shape us.
When I was a preteen I remember reading a devotional. The
devotional talked about how the grass isn't always greener on the other side.
The context was marriage and the example had to do with laundry. And the only
other thing I remember is leaving that devotional time with this thought,
"It doesn't really matter how your spouse folds the towels, the important
part is that they are folding towels."
I don't know why I remember this. I don't know why my little
teen devotional magazine was talking that in depth about marriage. But, I'm
glad it did, because I think this concept has helped me in my marriage. A little
thing that stuck with me that I didn't put there on purpose.
When I was about 18 or 19 years old, a co-worker said
something to me that shaped the way I thought about myself as a mother. I was
going to college full time and I worked part time at a grocery store. My son,
would stay with my dad. The grocery store was basically on the same route to
and from school. Often times I would stop to get my paycheck either on my way
to school or on my way home. A weekly occurrence at the time. But one day a
co-worker said something along the lines of, "Geez, what do you do? I
never see you with your kid."
I remember feeling shocked, then sad and guilty, then angry.
I wanted to explain myself, "Well, you only see me while I'm working or on my way to and from school! I
obviously wouldn't have my child with me during those times!" Humpf! But
her words stung. And they settled deep. And for a long time, I operated out of
that lie. That I somehow wasn't a good enough mom because she never saw me with
my son. That I was somehow not spending enough time with him. It was a
downright lie. One that I held onto for a long time. At some point I was able
to uproot that lie and get free, but that one little thing, it shaped me.
Fast forward to today. During Pastor John's 'Free Indeed 'series at West Ridge, he talked about lies we believe versus the truth that
sets us free. And I realized that there are these little things, lies, which
I've let stick and have been operating out of. The vulnerable part here, I
don't know what all of them are right now, but I know that they are there. So
I'm asking God to show them to me, to reveal them so I can cut them off and
move on. It might take some time (mostly because I can be stubborn sometimes)
but I know God will continue to set me free.
I think that's why it's so important to stay "plugged
in". Plugged in to church community, small groups, serving, reading God's
Word, worshipping. Little by little God's breaking down the little things that
stick. And I'm so glad He's not done with me yet! The best is yet to be!
While reading this were you reminded of little things that
stuck with you? Were there good and/or bad things? How do you combat the
lies? We'd love to hear from you in the comments below!
Post by: Jimmie Lee DiIanni
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