We Need Each Other (How I Overcame My Fear of Friendships)

This is just part of my journey with being a part of small groups and why I think being “plugged” in is an important part of walking with God. 

-Jimmie Lee

I used to be afraid of other women. I was afraid to let them in. I was afraid to try to be friends. In pretty much every season of my life, I tended to keep this extremely small circle of friends. Part of this was my personality... quiet, shy. But mostly it was because I was filled with insecurity. This insecurity had me building up walls, making excuses and keeping me from relationships that would help me grow.  

About 7 or 8 years after I renewed my commitment to Jesus, I got fed up with feeling stuck all the time. Over those 8 years I had a group of friends who were strong Christians but not a whole lot of them were women, because they were mostly my husband’s friends. These friends were a crucial part of my walk with God but I needed women speaking into my life. This would mean I needed to step out of my comfort zone and step out in faith. 

I prayed that God would put women in my life that would love me and not judge me. It still took me a little while to get up the courage but I did end up getting involved in a women’s small group at a church near me. That group of women that God sent me to will always be a part of the tapestry that is my life. They prayed over me, spoke life into me, and all with God’s power; never judging or condemning. They were Jesus to me when I needed Him to break that fear and insecurity. God used that time in my life to prepare me for seasons ahead. He showed me that His daughters are a powerful force to be reckoned with when they join hands and seek Him. And He showed me that other women... are just like me! 

“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: What! You too? I thought I was the only one.” (adapted from C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves)

Today I almost crave that time with women and when it’s not there I miss it. My favorite part about coming together to talk about Jesus is experiencing the beauty. It is a beautiful thing that each of us, individually can be so different, but come together for one purpose. Your story, your journey, it matters and it could help another woman find freedom. God made us to do this life together. He created relationships! He made us to be a body and we all have something unique and powerful to bring the table. We are better together. 

“The heartfelt counsel of a friend is as sweet as perfume and incense” Proverbs 27:9 (NLT)

My life has not been the same since I stepped out in faith several years ago and joined in a women’s small group. In fact, much of my spiritual growth has been spurred on while being plugged into a small group. I have learned how to pray, speak life, encourage, love and support those around me through small groups. If you are thinking about joining a small group, but there is something holding you back, I encourage you to step out in faith! Don’t let the enemy’s lies keep you stuck. Whatever it is, insecurity, confusion, busyness, cast it aside and step out in faith. I promise you will find encouragement, love and spiritual growth! 

“So let’s do it—full of belief, confident that we’re presentable inside and out. Let’s keep a firm grip on the promises that keep us going. He always keeps his word. Let’s see how inventive we can be in encouraging love and helping out, not avoiding worshiping together as some do but spurring each other on, especially as we see the big Day approaching.” Hebrews 10:22-25 (MSG) 


Ladies, if you are interested in joining a small group, Jimmie Lee will be leading our next eight week session... Ever wonder what justification, redemption, and righteousness really mean for us as Christ followers? Join the Women’s Small Group Study on Wednesday, January 27th at 7:00. For the next 8 weeks, we will explore one life changing word per week and how it relates to the salvation we have in Jesus.  You won’t want to miss this time of growth, learning, and fellowship!  For more information and to register visit www.westridge.cc

How I Lost 30lbs. & Then Gained It All Back...

In September 2012, I surpassed my weight loss goal by losing over 30 pounds.  By September 2015, I had gained it all back.  What happened?! Were pizza, French fries and chocolate to blame?  Laziness? Is this just another “New Year/New You” weight loss post?!

No. Not at all.

Let me explain.  

Back in 2012, I was determined to get healthy.  I wanted to lose all the weight I had gained from bad eating habits and three pregnancies.  I didn’t like how out of shape I was and I cringed when I saw pictures of myself.  I found a diet and exercise plan that sounded reasonable.  Even my husband was on board and joined me!

Now, I’m such a rule follower.  In fact, I follow the rules so well that staying on the diet was something I was easily able to do.  Well, okay, maybe not easily. There were times when I was drooling over making my daughter a peanut butter and jelly sandwich while I knew another “carb-free” meal was awaiting me.  But, I had clear guidelines (a.k.a. rules) and I was able to stick with them.

When the diet ended, my husband and I were ecstatic with the results.  I actually had ended up losing more weight than I intended!  In fact, I had lost so much, I almost looked sick.  Like there was something really wrong with me.  My hip bones stuck out noticeably. My kiddos thought my lap was uncomfortable to lay their heads on.  (No more “cushion” I guess!)  Still, I was excited to start living in this “new” body and was enjoying working out daily.  In fact when I looked at myself in the mirror I felt like I had lost so much weight, I could eat however (and whatever) I wanted.  So I did.

There was problem though that I never tackled while I was dutifully eating right and working out.  I never addressed the fact that I use food as a comfort.  If I was stressed, taco dip sounded good!  And after the diet ended, cravings for pizza or fast food were no longer being denied but given in to.  And oh my, when the kiddos started getting crazy and my hormones were going nuts, chocolate sounded like the best decision ever! Snacking at night before the diet started was just part of my usual daily routine.  But while I was dieting, I stopped. Many glasses of water were guzzled in the evenings trying to drown out the grumblings of my empty stomach.

After the diet ended though, there was no “rule” that said I couldn’t satisfy my craving for cheese sticks or cheese curls.  There was no “rule” dictating to me that I must exercise.  So slowly but surely, the old habits returned (food = comfort) and brought the extra pounds right back with them. 

The real issue was that even though I had lost the weight and gotten healthier, I didn’t realize the comfort I was seeking could never be satisfied with food.  30 pounds later I have learned the hard way that my comfort is from Jesus and Jesus alone.  Now one would think, after all this time, after all I have seen God do in my life and in the lives of others this would come easy for me.  One would venture to guess that after all I have learned in my walk with Jesus that I would have grasped this by now.  But I’m still learning.  I’m so thankful that God is not done with me yet.

So that is why I am so eager for the upcoming 40 days of prayer and fasting that West Ridge will begin in the new year. (This special time will run January 3^rd through February 13^th.) I believe that God has asked me to cut chocolate from my diet (One of my favorites!) and to limit my food intake to three modest meals a day (That means no guacamole and chips at 9:00 at night!). And I’m sure there will be some bit of weight loss from this.  However, it’s not about losing weight right now.  For me, it is about coming to God and bringing Him the first of the new year.  There is a purpose for the prayer and fasting.  I want to be pursuing God in the beginning of this new year, this new start.  And in that time of prayer and fasting, I want to be seeking Him and learning how to truly allow Him to comfort me.  I believe that by coming to God first, by earnestly seeking Him and His heart, that our relationship will grow even closer.  I am confident that He will renew my mind, that He will break the yoke that has been bringing me down, and will bring us even closer together in unity. 

Ladies, it will be a good thing!  I’m entering in to this new season with an expectant heart and I hope you will too.  I’m not looking at this 40 day journey as a time of what I have to do without or even a time to follow a “rule” but a time of great expectation!  I’m looking forward to hearing from God, to receiving healing from God, and to gaining His vision of what He has in store for me in 2016 (and beyond)!

Sweet friends, this upcoming forty day journey, is going to be amazing!  It is going to be life changing!  Don’t hold back now.  Please don’t let 2016 kickoff and skip seeking God first!  Bring Him the first part of the year.  Come to Him through prayer.  Allow Him to speak to you in only ways He can! There probably is something God wants you to fast from. Prayerfully ask Him what it is.  It might be food, it might be technology, it may even be dare I say… coffee!  Whatever it is that God is leading you to, I want to encourage you to be obedient and participate in the fast.  God has awesome things that He wants to reveal to you, to speak into you, to show you, and to help you with!  Why miss that opportunity?

“Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen:

to loose the chains of injustice

and untie the cords of the yoke,

to set the oppressed free

and break every yoke?

Is it not to share your food with the hungry

and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter—

when you see the naked, to clothe them,

and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?

Then your light will break forth like the dawn,

and your healing will quickly appear;

then your righteousness will go before you,

and the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard.

Then you will call, and the Lord will answer;

you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.”

Isaiah 58:6-9(NIV)

Post by: Marcy Gates

By the way…  If you missed Pastor John Goebbel’s message concerning the upcoming 40 days of prayer and fasting at West Ridge, you can catch it right here: http://westridge.cc/display.php?s=79660