Monday, May 25, 2015

Not Your Average Dinner Out



I had wanted it to be special.  A fortieth birthday is nothing to shrug off.  But, as birthdays often do, my husband’s birthday snuck up on us both. There was no time for an elaborate, surprise, “over the hill” party or even a little get together.  No, we were barely able to coordinate schedules and get our act together to celebrate with a dinner out.

After arranging for the kids to spend the night with the grandparents, we had the task of picking a restaurant and making reservations.  My husband and I love to try to new places to eat.  Since, my husband is in the restaurant business though, a dinner out is rarely just enjoying the company and the meal.  He notices all those little things people who have never worked in the business would miss.

We picked a place that was new to us but not certainly not new to downtown Pittsburgh. The last thing we wanted to do after dropping off the kids was wait an hour and a half to eat dinner.  People, we are old.  We are in our late thirties/early forties but some days it feels like late seventies/early eighties!  Three kids, packed schedules, and 80 hour work weeks, had us feeling like maybe it was time to start considering the early bird special at Denny’s, then head home and go to sleep.

Our desire for an evening out that didn’t come with a kid’s menu and free babysitting (thanks Gammy & Pap-Pap!) won out.  We parked our van in the parking garage and headed towards the restaurant.  As we strolled down the city sidewalk, I thought of everyone who kept asking why we chose the place we did.  Didn’t we want to try somewhere flashier? Trendier? Somewhere up and coming? We couldn’t explain why, we just both felt like the restaurant we picked was where we needed to eat that evening.

But as we walked in to the run down building and headed into the restaurant, I was silently having some doubts about our choice.  The décor was late nineties, at best.  The carpet had seen much better days.  The room was packed though and we took it as a good sign that what the ambiance lacked, the food must make up for.

We sat at our table and as my hubby often does, he surveyed the room.  He noticed that most of the tables in the room were full but there were only two servers.  And those two servers were, as those in the restaurant biz call it, “in the weeds”.   They were slammed. They were stressed.  These two waiters were hustling from table to table, apologizing to customers for their meals taking so long and refilling drinks.

My heart sank.  When my husband said the kitchen must have crashed, I knew our experience was not going to be the best.  I felt so disappointed.  I really, really wanted this dinner to be great.  Not just for me (even though I did get dressed up, had makeup on, and fixed my hair – this doesn’t happen every day!) but to be a true celebration of my husband’s birthday.  And now, well, now it seemed like it was going downhill fast.  

Our server finally managed to make it over to the table and he was sweating! This was not just a little “hey it’s kinda hot in here” glow.  It was profuse, “I’m working as hard as I possibly can” SWEAT. He explained they were running a bit behind but he’d be back to get our order as soon as he could.  My husband and I exchanged glances and we both knew this was going to be a loooong meal. Then my hubby told me about how he felt bad for our server.  This man was working so hard, he was breaking a sweat.  To make it worse, the other customers waiting for their meals were complaining. Loudly.

Now, I was starting to feel bad for the guy too!  When he came back to take our order, I made sure I was the nicest customer he had had all evening.  I wanted to make waiting on our table easy on him! He took our orders and headed off to get our drinks.  

Our waiter returned quickly with our drinks and as the other diners meals started coming out, things got less crazy. You could feel the tension dissipating in the room.  When he came by to drop off our bread, we got to chat with him for a minute.

He told us how crazy it had been there that night.  How he was really tired.  Not only had he been working hard that day but he had been spending all the rest of his time at the hospital.  

“Oh no, what’s wrong?” I asked.  

Our server paused, then spilled his heart out, “My finance was in an accident and she’s in intensive care.  She has head trauma real bad.  I’m all she has here so I’ve been spending all my time at the hospital.  She never wants me to leave.  But it’s hard.  I have to come to work here and take care of stuff at home too. I haven’t done laundry in days.”  

My husband and I questioned him further and talked with him about what had been going on.  His story tugged on our heart strings. The poor guy was going through a really rough patch.  Having a stressful evening at work wasn’t helping him either.  He headed off to the kitchen and left my hubby and me there to digest his story.

When our server came by to say our meals were almost ready, my husband told him that we would pray for him and his fiancé.  This seemed to comfort our server and he thanked us in advance for praying. But as I heard my husband speak those words, I felt the Holy Spirit stir inside and tell me we needed to pray right then and now! So I blurted out, “Why don’t we pray right now?”

You guys, that is not typical Marcy behavior.  I will gladly pray with you or for you, if you ask me to.  I will offer to pray for and with my family and friends.  Most of the time though, I will pray for you in private, just the Lord and I aware of it. However, this was the first time, I offered on the spot to pray for a stranger right there, live, face to face.  I was compelled to do it.  I could not ignore what the Holy Spirit was leading me to do.  There were no second thoughts of what other diners would think or if this server might shrink back from our table, he and our food never to be seen again! 

And so we prayed.  In the midst of people eating their dinner and in the middle of the restaurant, my husband, our server, and I held hands and prayed for his fiancé.  I prayed for her healing and complete recovery.  Led by the Spirit, I asked God to strengthen and comfort this man, who we were now on a first name basis with.  When I finished praying, I think we all had tears in our eyes.

I looked around the room and realized it was empty.  We were the only diners left.  Our server went off to the kitchen and came back with our meals.  Since we were the last customers in the place, we had the whole restaurant to ourselves.  

We ate our dinner and chatted a bit more with our waiter.  The meal itself wasn’t anything fancy.  The food was good but the meal wasn’t anything special.  We paid our bill and said goodbye to our waiter.  My husband and I smiled, then left the restaurant hand in hand.

As we walked along the sidewalk back to the parking garage, we realized it was no accident that we had dinner at that restaurant.  Lots of little things here and there tried to sidetrack us and make us change our minds and pick somewhere else.  Even as we walked in at sat at our table, we could have gotten up and left what looked like a disappointing and uncomfortable situation.  Yet, it had felt to both of us that that restaurant was where we needed to be.

How often do you experience those situations? How quickly do we shrug off those promptings by the Holy Spirit because we are afraid of how people will react?  I want to encourage you today not to fear. Don’t worry about what other people will think.  When God nudges your heart, pay attention to it.  Be obedient to what He is leading you to do.  I promise, you will not regret it. 

“Pray in the Spirit at all times and on every occasion. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all believers everywhere.” Ephesians 6:18 (NLT)

“I urge, then, first of all, that requests, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for everyone.” 1 Timothy 2:1 (NIV)

“Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.” Galatians 5:25 (NIV)

Post by: Marcy Gates





Wednesday, May 13, 2015

A Royal Mess or Royalty?



“Isn’t it funny how day by day nothing changes but when you look back everything is different” - C.S. Lewis 

When I consider many things in life, I find a common thread among them all and that is, process. Most things in life have to go through a process to get to an end or a level of completion. The process typically takes time. Some, more time than others, but time is always part of the deal. It takes time to become something. 

In our culture, we don’t like waiting. We are almost trained to want things ‘right now!’ We get impatient, frustrated, bored, or angry. I am guilty of all of these things and as much as I try to have patience, often times I do not. I get especially frustrated when I don’t understand why I am going through the process, why it is taking too long, or when the results are not what I envisioned. I try to control things or rush them. In the past I would give up or run from the process of becoming. Can you relate to these things? 

I will admit, rarely was my first reaction to trust God. 

And when I choose that way. When I choose to take my eyes off of Jesus and put things into my own hands, I royally mess things up. So now not only is the process hard or confusing, it’s messy. And I get messy.

If there is one thing I have learned from messing up the process because I don’t want to wait, it is that God ALWAYS works everything out for the good of those who love him! (Romans 8:28)

“Remember how far you’ve come, not just how far you have to go. You are not where you want to be, but neither are you where you used to be.”- Rick Warren

Remember I said I would run from becoming? In those days, I would picture God up there wagging his finger at me with his angry face on. Then I would feel like a failure. Like I had to make up for the mess I just made. 

More recently God has shown me in a grand way that he’s not up there with his angry face on. No, not all. In those messy times when I feel like a royal failure, God is right beside me. He is there next to me, loving me through it all. He is there next to me saying, “Sweet daughter, please stop trying to control this. Trust me. Rest in Me.” And then He wraps His arms around me like only a father can comfort his daughter. In that moment I remember, I am not a royal mess, I am a royal princess! 

Dear sisters, the process isn’t always easy or understood but when you keep your eyes on Jesus and you trust Him for your comfort, guidance, and wisdom then the process is so much sweeter. Turning the page can be a beautiful thing! 

“You may not always end up where you thought you were going. But you will always end up where you are meant to be.” -Unknown

Post by: Jimmie Lee