Transitions

Transitions in life happen all the time. We have all gone through a transition at one time or another. Maybe some of us have gone through more transitions then another but, transitions are one thing we all have in common. Some transitions are smaller like starting a new school year (still hard though!), or having a birthday. Other transitions are more life altering like getting married, having a baby, getting a new job, losing a loved one, or moving to a new town.

Over the last five years, I feel like I have experienced more life altering transitions than the average bear (in what I would consider a small amount of time). In honor of transparency, since 2011 I have: had a baby, lost a job, found a job, changed churches, lost a parent, went through leadership changes in my agency, lost another job, took a position with same company, had 5 different job titles in 2 years, decided to leave my agency (after 7 years there) and basically my profession, at least for now... And here we are! This is just my part of the story because my husband has had some transitions in there too. You could say I know a little bit about transitions. But I am no expert. No, I won’t lay claim to that. Although I thought I might have some helpful tips to share with you if you are going through a transition, whether it be big or small.

I confess, I have not always done transition well. I kick and scream and whine and moan. Okay, maybe not to the visible eye but on the inside I am a toddler throwing the mother of all tantrums!

So over the last five years I have discovered 3 things that help me thrive during life transitions when I would really just rather crawl in bed and hibernate for life (was that a little too dramatic?). I would love to encourage you with them if I could:

1.  Take extra good care of yourself!

Self-care can be hard for some of us, but it is so important! (Like in those airplane preflight instructions, putting on your oxygen mask first before you put one on your child.) During times of transition, taking extra good care of yourself will help you wade through it. For me it’s about staying at equilibrium. So whatever that looks like for you, do it. If you need more sleep (I always do!), then sleep more. The dishes and laundry will be there when you wake up! Take a hot shower in the middle of the day, get a manicure, or splurge on the large coffee drink! And please, please, please ask for help! Call that friend you know will pray with you, tell someone you need encouragement, or a babysitter, or just a shoulder to cry on. Taking good care of yourself may sometimes mean the need to call in for reinforcements.

 “Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weakness so that Christ's power may rest on me” 2 Corinthians 12: 8-9 (NIV)

2.  The do what you can plan!

I read Holley Gerth’s ebook “The Do What You Can Plan” a few years back and this is what settled in my heart, ‘Something is better than nothing’ That mentality has helped me through so many times of transition! If you can only do 10 minutes of exercise a day, something is better than nothing and you can work your way up! If I have 6 loads of laundry backed up I wash our necessities to get us through the week. Do what you can! If it ALL doesn’t get done? It is okay. Something is better than nothing and God’s grace is everything!

“It's useless to rise early and go to bed late, and work your worried fingers to the bone. Don't you know he enjoys giving rest to those he loves?” Psalm 127:2 (MSG)

3.  Prayer AND Worship!

Prayer will most certainly help you thrive during these times. I always say it, if I am a hot mess with Jesus I wouldn’t even want to see me without Jesus. My goodness, I need Jesus every day! Amen? Amen!

And worship? Worship is good all the time, but I can’t tell you how many times worship has broken chains and set me free from pressure and anxiety! When I have felt like I can’t possibly bear one more change, I know I have to completely surrender to God in worship. It might look different for you, but for me I try to find time alone in the dark, I blast my worship playlist, raise my hands and just start praising and thanking God (I’m usually pacing back and forth like a crazy person too!). I’m telling you transition or not, this will break whatever is binding you up!

“Don't fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God's wholeness, everything coming together for good will come and settle you down. It's wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.” Philippians 4:6-7 (MSG)

So there you have it, three things to help you thrive through transitions. Take extra good care of yourself, ‘the do what you can plan’, and prayer + worship! Learning to give myself grace has also helped me to thrive through transition. As I have headed into this current transition, I’ve noticed it’s not as foggy as the ones before. These 3 things have helped me keep clear eyes and a full heart! (Oh hey speaking of clear eyes and a full heart... http://westridgewomen.blogspot.com/2016/08/clear-eyes-full-hearts-cant-lose.html)

If you are no stranger to life transitions and you have some tips for us, we would love to read your encouragement in the comments section! Or if you are going through a life transition and you need prayer or encouragement please let us know! We would love to come along side you. Iron sharpens iron and we all need each other, amen!

Ladies, we love you and are here for you!  Email us at women@westridge.cc

Post by: Jimmie Lee DiIanni

What Lies Ahead?

I put my baby on the school bus for the first time a couple days ago.  Well, let me clarify, I did not set a car carrier with a baby strapped in it inside a school bus.  I said goodbye to my youngest child, my baby. She went off and joined her older sisters at elementary school.  Which leaves this stay at home momma alone for hours each day. (Is it possible to do a fist bump and cry and dance for joy all at the same time?!)

The most asked question I have received this past summer was, “What are you going to do ALL DAY?!?!?” There are things on my to-do list that I’m surely looking forward to checking off.  But once that is done, I have no idea what I’ll be doing.  And you know what? That’s ok. Oh sure, I have some grand plans to clean and organize (and don’t tell my kids but I am purging their junk while they are off at school).  There are some things that I love to do that I now have more kid-free time to focus on (oh hi there blog!). And there are a few dreams I have too.  Some are just tiny seeds right now that God has planted in my heart.  Others are much closer, some even close enough to touch. I am entering a new season in life, for sure. Am I scared? Am I nervous? Nope.

I’ll share my secret with you as to why.  The best way to walk into a new season in life is... Know WHO you are, WHOSE you are, and to PRAY.  Didn’t Jimmie Lee do such a great job in her last post The Be Yourself Challenge, challenging us to be ourselves (#thebeyourselfchallenge)?!  I know for me, it was a great reminder that I need to be who God created me to be.  I need to hold onto this especially as I enter into this new time in my life. I can’t be looking at how other moms spend their days or what other ladies are up to. It would do me no good to waste hours being envious of one person’s appearance, exercise habits, Instagram pics, etc. I have to be at ease with the woman God created me to be.  So just who is that?!

I am Marcy.  I love Jesus, my husband, my daughters, coffee, and staying up way too late.  I love writing; it allows me to share my heart using words on a screen when they sometimes just can’t make it out of my mouth. I enjoy reading books with paper pages (ok, Kindles are cool too). I am an introvert with extrovert daydreams.  The smell of lumber and office supplies makes me giddy.  A vast amount of pop culture trivia fills my brain and not enough math facts. I am loyal and trustworthy.  I love the simple things and have always wanted to be a “country girl”, just don’t take away my WiFi. I feel all the feels – I can easily put myself in someone’s shoes and see life from their perspective. Chocolate is my favorite and I am a firm believer that the inventor of cream cheese is a genius! Small talk is difficult for me but I can talk with a trusted friend for hours. My passion is to share with women the life changing power of Jesus Christ and to point their hearts to Him!

Knowing who I am allows me to move confidently into this new season.  I’m not running around trying to be like this, that, or the other.  I have learned to enjoy and embrace who I am because I love my Creator and I know He loves me!  I trust Him and I know that He does not make mistakes. His Word tells me that He made me and that I am wonderful – just as I am.

“Your hands made me and formed me.” Psalm 119:73a (NIV)

“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” Psalm 139:14 (NIV)

I could beat myself up over not being like so and so.  Perhaps maybe try hard to drink more smoothies and less lattes.  But I would be miserable.  (Side note, I cannot understand those green smoothies y’all.  More power to you if that’s your jam! You go on with your healthy choices girl!) I could put so much energy and effort into being like someone else or trying to fulfill the world’s expectations of me.  But by doing that, I would be taking my eyes of off God and what He is doing.  It would be like getting ready to go on a hike in the forest without a compass, wearing someone else’s flip flops, while it is raining. What could be worse than entering unknown territory while feeling unhappy, confused, and exhausted?

To make things even worse, what if I didn’t know to WHOM I belonged?  How could I even start on a new path if I did know that I am loved no matter what, whether I succeed or fail? How could I gaze upon new uncharted waters without knowing that as I wade out into them, the waves will not overtake me because I am anchored?  How can I possibly rest in who I am if I don’t know that He delights in me – just as I am? I can’t.  You can’t.  Ladies, let’s never lose sight that we belong to an amazing God.  Here’s just a little reminder for you (and me) about the God to whom we belong:

We are holy and dearly loved by God. (Col. 3:12)

We are His workmanship. (Eph. 2:10)

He delights in us. (Zeph. 3:17)

He chose us. (1 Peter 2:9-10)

He is working all things together for our good. (Rom. 8:28)

He has great and precious promises for us. (2 Peter 1:4)

When we know who we are and whose we are, we can approach the throne of God with full confidence, asking for His will to be done in our lives.  That is why prayer is vital.  Prayer opens up your heart to receive from God not only wisdom and understanding for today but it allows Him to place dreams in your heart for the future!  You wouldn’t go up to some stranger on the street and ask, “Hey, do you think I should go work here or do something else instead?” No! But you may ask someone close to you, perhaps a trusted friend, “Listen, I’m thinking about doing such and such.  What are your thoughts?” So why not turn to God in prayer? He is our most trusted friend right?! Seek out what His will is for you.  Ask Him to reveal His plans for you.  That’s what I have been doing.  Has God revealed it all to me? Has He laid it all out like a beautiful straight line showing Point A to Point B? Ha, no, not quite. But that’s ok – He’s given me what I need to know for right now.  And whatever He has in store for the future, I know that will be good too!

“Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know.” Jeremiah 33:3 (NIV)

Ladies, I am walking in to this new season with joy and not fear.  I am placing one foot ahead of the other, with my gaze fixed straight ahead (Prov. 4:25).  I don’t know exactly what lies down the road but I am EXCITED! I am comfortable with who I am, not because I “have it all together” or think I am some super, awesome, perfect person.  I’m not.  I can be at ease because God has opened my eyes to the talents and personality traits that He has given me that are unique to how He created me. There’s only one Marcy and I’m it! I know WHO I am.  I am a daughter of the one, true King! (And just to let you in on a little secret, in Him, His daughters find favor and blessings!) I am not anxious because I know the character and promises of the One to WHOM I belong.  His love for me is true and everlasting.  And I know He has amazing plans for me!

“I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.” Jeremiah 29:11 (MSG)

Ladies, are you embarking on a new season in life too?  Maybe you just sent your youngest off to college or down the aisle. Maybe you just began school or perhaps are trying to decide what to do with your career.  Have you just ended a relationship or are facing some tough challenges ahead? We can walk into these new seasons with confidence, covered in God’s grace.  Remember WHO you are and if you have forgotten, ask Jesus to remind you.  Ask Him to show you what your gifts are and what makes you, YOU! Recall to WHOM you belong.  When you have doubts, re-read the Scriptures I listed above and prayerfully ask God to reveal His heart for you.  And in every situation PRAY. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you!

Post by: Marcy Gates

The "Be Yourself" Challenge

What if we decided to just be who we are all the time? No matter what. Whether we get accolades or push-back, we were just ourselves? What if we stopped trying so hard to be something else... someone else? What if instead, we operated out of who God created us to be?

There is this thought that has quietly been in the back of my heart, one that I have unknowingly been operating from. I tell myself things like, “If I was like her then I would be good at___________ (fill in the blank)”, or “If I was like that, then I have ‘arrived’ and I would be good enough to lead.” I realized that many of my decisions and actions came from this place of thinking that I needed to have it all together to be able to do the things I have been called to do. But more so, what my made up version of  “having it all together” actually looked like.

I think of myself as an authentic person, you know, ‘What you see is what you get’. But I realized that I was actually trying to be someone I am not. I was trying to fit myself into this tiny little box of made up unspoken expectations that I assumed other people had for me. Like I had to reach some kind of cultural standard to be a good enough friend, leader, or even Christian. But trying to be someone you are not, trying to fit some kind of made up standard you are not even really sure exist, it’s exhausting! And a little bit terrifying.

I was operating out of a bunch of “should’s”.  I should:

• be more outgoing
• be better at conversation
• be less emotional
• smile more
• be more organized
• be less straight forward
• be kinder, sweeter, more peppy,
• only listen to worship music
• never get angry
• exercise (in matching cute clothes of course)
• do more
• be less
• have it all together by now

Trying to fit into that box meant I could never truly be myself. Can you relate? Have you ever felt small, not enough, too much or all of the above just because you were yourself?

I no longer want to operate out of “should’s” or unspoken, made up expectations. I want to operate out of who God made me to be.

“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” Psalm 139:13-14 (NIV)

I love Psalm 139 because it means, I am known. I am loved. I am wonderful. It means the very same for you too. There is no one else like me! There is no one else like you! I don’t need to lead like her, I need to lead like me. I don’t need to pray like her, I need to pray like me. I don’t need to worship like her, I need to worship like me! You see, I want to love who I am so I can love you better. I want to walk out who God created me to be so that you are encouraged to walk out who God created you to be!

So here is #thebeyourselfchallange! Remember in the beginning I asked, “What if we decided to be who we are?” All the time. No matter what. Let’s do it! Let’s put our energy into being who God made us to be and let our love pour from that.

I am starting with reminding myself who I am:

I am Jimmie Lee. I am mostly quiet, a little sarcastic and sometimes slow to get the jokes. I laugh when no one else does, I dance and people look at me funny, I am goofy and silly and love lame jokes. (Ask me what my favorite joke is!) I cry when I am happy, sad, mad and everything in between. In a room full of people I am usually the one observing from the corner. I love coffee, Gilmore Girls, and coloring. I have an eclectic taste in music, especially the dancing kind. My favorite outfit is a cute shirt and jeans. I have low days and bright days. I love my boys like no one else (except maybe their mammy). I am my husband’s number one fan (except maybe his mom). I am real, I listen, and I care. I am restorative by nature and love to see women set free! I am passionate about God’s grace and freedom. I sway, jump up and down, raise my hands, cry and bend low when I worship. I am fully known and yet still fully loved by the Creator of the universe! And I am so much more than what you see.

Okay! It’s your turn. How are you starting #thebeyourselfchallange? Tell us in the comments, send us an e-mail, or tag us on Facebook and/or Instagram! I am excited to hear from you all!

Post by: Jimmie Lee DiIanni

Clear Eyes, Full Hearts, Can't Lose

Well, here we are in August.  Once again, I marvel at how quickly another summer seems to be slipping through my fingers.  By now, most vacations and trips have been taken.  Swimming, s’mores, and fire-fly catching (or lightning bugs, as we call them here in Pittsburgh!) have all been checked off of our “Summer Bucket List”.  Back to school ads are popping up on TV.  (This mom just did a silent cheer. And I’m not even kidding you guys.)

August also means our Women’s Small Group study at West Ridge has wrapped up.  This summer, we studied “The Armor of God” by Priscilla Shirer.  I loved, loved, loved this study!  I thought I was pretty familiar with the armor of God (and even wrote about it here awhile back: http://westridgewomen.blogspot.com/2014/11/the-ups-and-downs-of-life.html) but Priscilla’s book helped me to really dig in deep to each piece of armor.  Each week, she broke down the nuances to each part and explained the armor of God in a way that I know I will treasure for years to come.

There is one theme though, that Priscilla taught early on that has stuck with me through the 8 week study.  In fact, it came up in our very first session and I keep returning to it time and time again.  Our REAL enemy.  You see, our real enemy is not the problems we are facing, the issues that are stressing us out, or the stuff that is keeping us up at night.  Nope.  It is the unseen.  All that “stuff”, it is a distraction shoved up in our faces to keep us from recognizing the truth.  The real enemy is Satan and he is trying to distract and derail us!

“For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.” Ephesians 6:12 (NIV)

But how can you recognize the unseen? Clear eyes, my friend. Which totally reminds me of Coach Taylor from the TV series, “Friday Night Lights”.  If you didn’t catch that show a few years back, it was about a high school football team set in the fictional small town of Dillon, Texas. (Texas forever y’all!) The phrase that Coach Taylor used to motivate his team each Friday evening when they were facing a tough opponent was: “Clear eyes, full hearts, can’t lose!” It was their rallying cry! When the team heard that phrase, they got fired up, ready to head into battle.

When I read Ephesians 1:18, Paul reminds us of just that – clear eyes! “I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people.” (NIV)

What about a full heart? Well, Paul addresses that a short time later in Ephesians 3:17-19, “And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.”

If we belong to Jesus, our hearts are full!  The Amplified version of verse 19 translates it like this, “and [that you may come] to know [practically, through personal experience] the love of Christ which far surpasses [mere] knowledge [without experience], that you may be filled up [throughout your being] to all the fullness of God [so that you may have the richest experience of God’s presence in your lives, completely filled and flooded with God Himself].

Oooh I love that! The richest experience of God’s presence! Filled and flooded with God Himself?! Ah, that is awesome, awesome stuff.  How could our hearts not be full?!

So if we have clear eyes (we do!) and full hearts (oh yes!) then my friends, we can’t lose! As Priscilla reminded us at our study the very first week, the victory is irrevocable.  Jesus died on the cross and was resurrected from the dead. And I know it has been said so many times but if you read the end of the Bible... It says we win in the end!  (Hope I didn’t ruin it for you if you didn’t quite get to that part of the Bible yet, lol!)  Ladies, WE CAN’T LOSE!

“They triumphed over him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony; they did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death.” Revelation 12:11 (NIV)

So as we move forward and transition from one season to the next, from one trial to the next, or one problem to the next, I’d like to encourage you to have clear eyes! Recognize the real enemy.  As the leaves begin to turn colors, pumpkin lattes start showing up, and all those issues seem to be weighing you down or distracting you, press on!  With a full heart, suit up in the armor of God for our victory is assured! We can’t lose!

Post by: Marcy Gates

Peace & Rest

Most mornings I wake up, rub my still sleepy eyes and look at the glow of my phone. Sometimes if my brain switches on too soon, I decide to put in my passcode to unlock my phone rather than just snooze my alarm. I’ll scroll through Facebook and Instagram, although I am not really sure why because no one really posts between 11pm and 7am. I wince and groan because I don’t really want to get out of bed. So, I scroll a little longer to procrastinate the inevitable. I am good at that, procrastinating the inevitable. The thought of a fresh steaming cup of coffee eventually gets me out of bed. That and the fact that I have now wasted too much time and have only half the time to get ready.

On these days, social media and culture have stolen my attention by 7:30 am and I can’t say it is always life giving or good for my soul. As I am off and running, there is work, then errands, dinner and chores, building Legos and fixing forts and by the end of the day I am spent. As I try to rest my head at night, I have so many thoughts swirling through my head... I just can’t even. I start out on my stomach with my head to left, then I switch it to the right. I turn to my right side with my knees pulled in tight then toss to my left side pushing my legs out straight. I might do this twice (it’s like a 20 minute process people!) before I finally drift off to sleep.

I would bet that many of you find this routine strangely familiar. (Maybe not the bed time tossing and turning, but the daily routine in general?) We have so many things competing for our attention, it is so easy to stay distracted, busy and at unrest. We hear about this story and skim through that article. Put out that fire and mop up this mess. When we finally settle in with our third cup of joe (or maybe that’s just me!) our phone dings 4 times in a row with something else that needs our attention.

Even though I love the small quiet moments, I’ll be honest I don’t always do rest well.

Jesus said, “The Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath.” Mark 2:27 (NIV)

Observing the Sabbath was commanded to us, yes, but the command was given as a blessing.

“For in six days the LORD made the heavens and the earth, the sea, and all that is in them, and rested the seventh day. Therefore the LORD blessed the Sabbath day and hallowed it.” Exodus 20:11(NKJV)

God has set apart a day of rest to bless his children. I really love that phrase, set apart. It means this day is supposed to look different, feel different... BE different. No striving, no fussing, no distractions or things pulling us in all directions. Just you and Jesus, the Lord of the Sabbath and rest.

I want to do rest, well. I want my Sabbath to look different from my other days. Because I believe that in His rest, we find peace. And God’s peace makes us walk differently.

“You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust you.” Isaiah 26:3 (NIV)

How can you begin to incorporate the Sabbath into your life? If you already set apart this day, how has it helped you throughout the rest of your week? We would love to hear your thoughts in the comments…

Post by: Jimmie Lee DiIanni

If Luck Is All You Have...

A few weeks ago I wasn’t feeling too well.  And what do we do these days when we are sick? That’s right! We input our symptoms on WebMD! Then promptly receive the diagnosis that we’re dying, lol! I’m kidding. Usually it will tell you to seek the opinion of a doctor.  So after going back and forth about what I should do, I finally made the decision to go to the ER. 

Now this is not the exact recounting of my illness (Lyme’s Disease) and how awful I felt.  Because I felt pretty rough.  This is the story about something that struck me as fascinating during my hospital stay.  It’s about what people kept offering me… Luck.  Or shall I say, the bestowing of “good luck” sentiments upon me by just about every person I met while in the hospital.

I need to preface my story with this tidbit…  A few days before I started to not feel well, the Lord guided me to a verse during my quiet time that I held onto as that week progressed. At the time, I really didn’t know why God led me to this verse but I believed there was a specific reason for it. He gave me Jeremiah 30:17a (NKJV):

“For I will restore health to you

And heal you of your wounds,’ says the Lord.”

As the next few days unfolded, I held on to that verse dearly.  I had written it down on a simple notecard, keeping it in plain view all the time.  I recalled it as I lay in bed aching.  I thought of it as I began a collection of black and blue marks on my arms from the IV’s and blood draws. It reassured me as the hours, then days went by.

As I spent time in the hospital, the doctors were having a difficult time figuring out just what exactly was wrong with me.  Despite all the unknowns though, I was comforted and steadied by the love and fervent prayers of my family and dear friends.  I knew that whatever the doctors diagnosed me with, that God was with me.  I was confident that He would heal me just as He said in the verse He given me a few days earlier.

But there was something that really stuck out to me while I was in the hospital.  It seemed like every person I came in to contact with be it a nurse, a doctor, the food service worker delivering my meal – they all would wish me good luck as they left me.  In fact, I was bid “Good luck!” so much, I was starting to wonder if I had somehow in my feverish state, wandered into a casino instead of a hospital!

If a tech would finish drawing my blood, he’d depart and say, “Well, good luck to you.  Hope you feel better!” Or as my nurse would finish her shift and leave, she would walk out of my room saying, “Good luck!  I hope you get well soon!”

Now, I know in our society, it can be frowned upon to share your faith in the work place.  I mean, I certainly wasn’t expecting any of the hospital staff to offer to pray for me or mention God really at all.  (Which can I just pause and let the heaviness of that statement kick in. I don’t know about you but that kinda makes my heart a bit sad.) But the mention of luck happened so often, I began to wonder, if I wasn’t a Christian, and so called “luck” was all I had, how in the world would I make it?

I mean, there I was, so sick it warranted a few days in the hospital.  I had full confidence God would heal me because He told me in His Word He would!  I had the love of the Father comforting me and strengthening me.  I knew that whatever the future would hold, no matter what my diagnosis would be, God held my future.  And that was enough for me.

But you guys, there are so many who don’t have that.  They are desperately holding on to luck.

My hospital room was semi-private and half way through my stay, I had a roommate.  We shared our stories with each other of how each of us ended up in the hospital.  She was as eager to leave the hospital as I was.  Her doctors would inform her that with luck, she’d get to go home the next day.  She was clinging to that.  She wanted to get out of there in the worst way.  From my bed across the room, I silently petitioned God to heal her and restore her.

When the next day arrived, I had a diagnosis and discharge papers.  I packed up and left our room, heading home.  While my roommate sadly, lay in her bed.  She was still hooked up to monitors and going home was not going to happen for her that day.   We said goodbye and she (of course) wished me “Good luck!”

Ladies, what do you think I said?? 

I looked her in the eyes and warmly told her, “I hope you get to go home soon!  I’ll be praying for you!”

Sweet friend, if luck is all you are holding on to today, may I suggest another way?  Because, when it all comes down to it, if luck is all you have – then really, you have nothing.  There is no such thing as luck but there is a Savior!  A Savior who is so much better than so-called luck.  Jesus - mightier than anything we face! He is with us, He is for us, and He will never leave us! He is our hope, our healer and with Him all things are possible!

Ladies, if you need prayer or if you have questions, the Bloom Ministry is always here for you, please email women@westridge.cc. We love you!

Post by: Marcy Gates

The Comparison Trap

Comparison. It can be hard not to compare ourselves with those around us. Particularly in our current culture. We have our little circle that encompasses where we live and that affects us. But there is also… The internet.

We have 24 hour access to what everyone else is doing, pinning, liking, and tweeting. Life can look beyond perfect in social media land. I probably don’t have to tell you about all of the ways ‘internet life’ can make us feel like we are failing at our own lives. Don’t get me wrong, there are very, very good things on the internet! After all, THIS blog from the Bloom Ministry is here on the internet, lol!

Social media can be a great platform for encouraging people and spurring them on toward Christ. You can also keep in touch with friends and family who don’t live close. But even with all of the good things, it is really easy to begin comparing our lives with our 1,000 plus Facebook friends, before we even realize what we are doing. I think it happens little by little. A thought here, a thought there. Then, by the end of the week or even the end of the day, we are feeling like we are less then. We get those pesky feelings of not being enough and just filled with “icky”.

Do you feel it sometimes too? Can you identify with this comparison trap we fall into? It doesn’t just happen in internet life. It can happen at the grocery store, sitting at dance classes, having coffee with a friend, or entering a church building. The comparison trap is one so many of us get tangled up in.  It is easy to think you should be doing things like everyone else. But you know what? That is a recipe for stress, shame and guilt. Things that are not of God.

Have you been beating yourself up because your kiddo's birthday is right around the corner and elaborately themed parties just aren’t your thing?  People are expecting a party and it just has to measure up to little Janie’s party that you went to last month. But you’ve been scouring Pinterest and are beginning to feel inadequate, like you are a terrible mom? Or perhaps you love cutting kiwi and bananas into palm trees for a fun snack for your littles, but your friends don’t seem to bother with all that fuss for their families. (Side note: My birthday is in August and you can invite me over for lunch anytime!)  Or what if your friend of a friend of a Facebook friend just posted awesome beach vacation pictures and you are sitting on your porch scrolling through them while on your “staycation”? Are you suddenly comparing her life, talents, etc. with yours? When the comparison trap is bringing you down, what can you do? Do what God has called only you to do!

I give these things as an example because God laid this verse on my heart and I just keep coming back to it. Galatians 6:4-5 says this in The Message version, “Make careful exploration of who you are and the work you have been given and then sink yourself into that. Don’t be impressed with yourself. Don’t compare yourself with others. Each of you must take responsibility for doing the creative best you can with your own life.” Isn’t that good news?! Read it again!

God has given us all individual talents and gifts. I must say, if we are always concerned about what everyone else is doing, we can’t throw ourselves into what God has given us. Comparison can keep gaze shifting from the right and to the left instead of being fixed ahead, straight upon Jesus.

Ephesians 4:11-12, says it nicely, “And He Himself gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers, for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ...”

When we throw ourselves into the work God Himself has called us to then we can actually help each other better! Galatians 6 (NKJV) starts out with Paul telling the church to carry one another’s burdens. He makes a distinction between the word “burden” in verse two and the word “load” in verse five. The word load indicates a job that one would be expected to have the ability to handle. It’s “doable”! The word burden indicates a job that is too heavy to carry. If we are carrying our own load, throwing ourselves into the work God has given us, then when our brother or sister finds themselves with a burden too heavy to bear on their own, we are able to come alongside them and love them through it. If we are trying to be like everyone else, carrying a load that is not our own, carrying a load on top of our own, or carrying someone else’s load all together, things start to crumble. The need to perform or meet a standard that has not been set by God, becomes burdensome and we can falter.

It is important also to “make careful exploration of who you are”. The way we do this is by seeking God and asking Him who He made us to be. This is the first step into walking out your identity in Christ Jesus! We can ask Him what He has called us to. And sometimes, our work can change too, depending on the season we are in.  We must ask  this question of Him often! When we know who we are, and what God has called us to, then we can walk that out in confidence. We don’t have to compare ourselves with the woman next to us, because we know the work we have been called to. But, if the woman next to us needs us to help her carry a burden, then we can do that! “Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted.” Galatians 6:1 (NIV)

Paul also gives the church important instructions in the chapter preceding this, Galatians 5:16-26, shows us how to walk in the Spirit. By following this lifestyle, we are equipped to bear and share one another’s burden without comparison and without a negatively critical eye. When we get caught up in the comparison trap, we can bring everybody down. But, when we walk in the Spirit we are able to encourage everyone!

What are some things God has called you to? If you are called into leadership, God has placed you where you are for a reason. If you are a teacher, God gave you a passionate heart to help people grow. Whatever God has called you to, He has already equipped you with what you need.  Maybe God is calling you into a new season? Have you asked Him where it is He wants you to be? Listen to His voice and walk in that calling. We are all encouraged when one walks out their true identity in Christ! The Lord will guide and direct you where He wants you to go. You don’t have to look to the left or the right, because we are all uniquely designed by the God of the universe!

I love this quote and I see it often, “A flower doesn’t think of competing with the flower next to it. It just blooms” -Zen Shin

I like a bouquet of red roses. But, I stop in my tracks for a bouquet with all different types of flowers tied together. There is something about the unique differences of each one creatively put together to bring more beauty and radiance. God does the same with us. He creatively brings us together with all our unique gifts, talents, personalities and passions to bring about more beauty and radiance.

Sweet sisters, I pray that we continue to make careful exploration of who we are called to be in Christ!  I pray that we would not be puffed up or think more highly of ourselves, that we would no longer compare ourselves to the one on the left or the right, and that we would sink ourselves deep into the work God has called each of us to. I pray that we will continue to do our creative best with the life He has given us! That we would continue to walk in the Spirit, coming along side our brothers and sisters gently restoring them to Christ Jesus! I pray that we would know our Creator deeper every moment. Amen!

Post by: Jimmie Lee DiIanni